It’s Everything

My wife and I have been married for three years now, we dated for 9 years and I can honestly say I have loved every minute of it. It’s true I am very very lucky. I remember early on while we were dating and talking about our lives before we meet each other we realized that we had been at the same concerts and other venues and never ran into each other. That’s when she told me it’s all about timing.

She was right timing is very important.

Timing is everything with relationships.

Rashida Jones
Photo by Andrey Grushnikov on Pexels.com

I have lived through some stretches in life where it has felt like I have had the timing off. Just a little to soon or a tad to late however looking back even those moments where I was “off” were not wasted. I needed to fail and not get the jobs I applied for so that I could learn more and get to where I am now.

It’s fine to celebrate success but it is more important to heed the lessons of failure.

Bill Gates

My failures have taught me to understand when the right moments are and that the moment that matters the most is the moment that we are all in right now.

be mindful of the future but not at the expense of the moment

Qui Gon Jinn

Make today the best day you possibly can and if it is not working out just remember… chances are high that your timing could be off.

Left.. no Right.. Ok Straight Ahead..

Daily writing prompt
What gives you direction in life?

The Apple watch has a compass app on it and the app has an amazing feature called back track. The app will trace your route as you walk/hike and then play that route back to you so that you can get back to where you started.

When I was in the US Army Global positioning Satellites were first being brought on line and used to do the same thing as the watch and the back track option. I have a very poor sense of direction and because of that I have been on some Amelia Bedelia style adventures. I have never been so lost though that I have not found my way home.

What then is home?

Home is where the Heart is

Pliny the Elder

My heart is with my loved ones, my immediate and extended family is my heart and home. We may fight and disagree but we have and I really believe will always love each other and that is what gives me direction is love.

1 Corinthians 13:4–8a (ESV) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. 

Photo by Jasmine Carter on Pexels.com

Love is the promise that guides me

Dan Fogelberg
Photo by Alexander Grey on Pexels.com

Dedicated to…

In Europe there are many cathedrals. Buildings that are intrinsically art. Huge towering beautiful masterpieces reaching upwards and outwards. The cathedrals are religious monuments built by the community for centuries.

On our vacation my wife and I visited Duomo di Milano. The Duomo took 601 years to complete. Over 70 Architects worked on the church and countless craftsmen spent their lives building something. The church is huge,. Italy’s largest and the city of Milan basically is built around this church but, why? What would compel someone to dedicate so much time and effort and many would never see the end of the project? The easy answer is God, but more nuanced answer would be hope, faith, duty, love. So… God yes.

A question I think that deserves answering is, What is God? The answer is personal and telling of the person who answers it.

The whole community came together and built t a dedicate the monument to God. A place where people can commune worship and admire beautiful art and culture. Art, culture, science and love that has to be part of God right? If your God doesn’t have those facets what does that say about you?

I live in the United States and here there is a movement from many religious people to ban books, take away rights and freedoms of minorities and I can’t help but think that the religious folks doing this are worshipping such a small God. How can this be the actions of a God of hope and power?

God should inspire, uplift and make us build things.

If

Daily writing prompt
Do you have a quote you live your life by or think of often?

In middle school I was made to memorize Rudyard Kipling’s poem If. Honestly I no longer have it memorized, and I could not recite this poem when I was made to memorize it and I can not recite the poem now but, like all great art work the poem inspired and inspires me now. I can tell you that this poem makes me want to work harder and help my family, friends, community and strangers. The poem makes me take more responsibility for my actions and inactions. This poem reminds me that being an adult is about endurance and virtue and not for the faint of heart. I think of this poem often and truly love it.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

If you can keep your head when all about you   

    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,   

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

    But make allowance for their doubting too;   

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;   

    If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;   

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

    And treat those two impostors just the same;   

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

    And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

    To serve your turn long after they are gone,   

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

    Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,   

    Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

    If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,   

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,   

    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

If – Rudyard Kipling

After that first cup

Daily writing prompt
When do you feel most productive?

My favorite place to be is anywhere my wife is, other than those places I truly enjoy the grocery store or market right after the store or market has first opened up. There is a fresh feeling in the air. All the vendors have their food and wares out for purchase and the most fresh, ripe and best are prominently displayed. The employees are well rested and the food is freshly picked and washed. The grocery store or market is great in the early morning. There is hope that comes from seeing and buying something that was just harvested.

My favorite time of the day is the morning. I love that hopeful fresh feeling. At work when I can, I try to get most of my “hard” work done in the morning. I drink my coffee and attack the day. After morning is over the rest of the day is spent helping others and getting ready for tomorrow.

After my first cup of coffee I can do anything! Oh and so can you!

More than 5 Less than 7

The six word story is something I became interested in as of yesterday. The six word story is that.. a story told in just six words. For fun go ahead and Google (love how this word is now a verb or even a word at all), six word story examples. You are in for a treat my friend.

The most famous six word story is a bit of a bummer and attributed to Ernest Hemmingway, not sure if he actually wrote it but here is the story;

“For sale: baby shoes. Never worn.”

Powerful but a complete bummer, right? I tried to remember a six word story that was more up beat and I came up with a lyric from a Jay Z song;

“I came, I saw I conquered”

I like that. I hope this can be said for your day today and mine to. I tired to think of a good six word story to encourage anyone reading this and I came up with this;

“Make Today Better for everyone meet”

Look I am no Hemmingway. I found a master class on six word stories and this gem was in the class;

Google: how to inflate a liferaft!

Ha, got to love dark humor! I think I like the idea of six word story because it is making an impression in six words. Less is always more. Words are wonderful but too many words are counter productive. Action for others service is what speaks the loudest and makes the biggest difference in your own life and your communities. On that note I will leave with my most recent six word story.

“Words; less than action be more”

Number three

Daily writing prompt
How would you improve your community?

During the week I wake up, perform my morning rituals and then drive into work. After work I usually spend a half hour at the gym, then the grocery store and finally I head home. I spend the majority of my time during the work week at home (my 1st place) and work (my 2nd place).

Ray Oldenburg coined the term 3rd place. Our 3rd places are where we come together as a community and exchange ideas, have a good time and build community. Today many of our 3rd locations have become digital, some may even argue that wordpress and facebook are 3rd places.

Photo by Ricky Esquivel on Pexels.com

My wife and I have worked at soup kitchens and my favorite part about the soup kitchen was meeting family and community members. I think that the soup kitchen functioned as a 3rd place for many of the community members.

I would love to develop for my community a third place that is safe, open, fun, and helps the community. I would imagine a place with a cafe and meal times (free meals). Then a lounge where the community can sit and talk play games watch tv. A true third place. A physical third place.

Growing up my third place was the local library. I would improve my community with a partnership with the local library. I would love to see the local library become more of a third place. I got to go now and donate some time and money to my local library.

Even the little ones

Big ideas, big projects and new times. I have two ideas that today have become projects for me. Before today the projects were just ideas but I made two small steps that transformed those ideas into tangible items projects. I have a whole bunch of steps to take before the projects are fully manifested but.. I want to celebrate!

When you are involved in a project, it is important to celebrate the small steps. Small steps matter a lot. Small steps lead to bigger steps and then victory.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step

Lao Tzu

Here is a great article that outlines the importance of the small steps.

Know this today is the day to take the first (even if it is small) step towards starting and completing the project that you will finish. One more thing to note, when you complete and while you are completing that first step on your major project I am cheering for you from the cheap seats.

Go insert your name here! You are crushing this!!

Me (in the cheap seats)

That’s nice

Just the other day I finished a task that was assigned to me in one of the software programs used by my team at work. After finishing each task the software plays a gif that has confetti exploding and I have to admit it makes me feel kind of good. The software we use is Monday dot com. Monday is project management software and uses project boards and to do lists. To do lists are powerful hacks that, when used properly make us very productive.

The reason that lists are considered a hack is because of dopamine. Dopamine is a chemical that the brain releases and makes us feel good. Dopamine helps move signals in our nervous system. A healthy happy person will have an appropriate level of dopamine in their body. When we cross off a list item and see confetti we trigger a dopamine release in our brains. Other ways to trigger the release of dopamine are, eating foods that are high in magnesium and tyrosine as well as engaging in healthy habits that make us happy like exercise meditation family time and petting a happy pet. Checking off things from a to do list is probably one of the closet things we can do at work that resembles petting a happy well behaved dog.

Photo by bin Ziegler on Pexels.com

Besides dopamine, lists offer focus. So until we can bring our dogs to work I will stick with my to do list. No if they allow me I would bring in my four legged friend and keep the to do list.

Photo by MART PRODUCTION on Pexels.com

Close to you

Promotions are a function of proximity. My oldest son started his career during the covid pandemic. He worked for his firm for a full year without ever visiting that firms office. Now that the world is entering the endemic phase of the Covid 19 virus he has of course visited the office but his in person schedule is still a little flexible.

There are business coaches who are now encouraging young people to get back into the office even if it is optional. Putting in face time really matters. People are social and physical creatures and connections matter. I have been reading and listening to many experts weigh in on the way the current and future workspaces look and every time I hear and read about the physical office and facetime I cannot help but think about the song (They Long to Be) Close to You by the Carpenters.

I am also reminded of a movie starring Bruce Willis called Surrogates. In the movie the whole world lives in their homes and send out surrogate bodies to the physical world to work and do their business. The movie is a dark sci fi movie and you learn the importance of connection to the visceral in the movie.

No matter how much human beings try to remove themselves from other humans and the physical world the fact that we are part of community and the physical world is inescapable.

The importance of showing up is often not given as much credit as it should be.

Photo by Markus Spiske on Pexels.com